Announcement 5: End of Chapter 2

As Fatima gets ready to jet of to Malawi, Chapter 2 draws to a close.

Next week we'll join Fatima and Imraan in Malawi for a 3 part Destination Mini Series that will be published Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

Chapter 3 will begin Monday the 8th of September.

We crossing the boarder...

are you ready for take off?
Ree

Part 26: Sweet memories and moments still to be

Today I have to put the finishing touches to Imraan's anniversary gift. It took me forever to figure out what to give him.

I know there are old English sayings about first anniversaries being paper and modern sayings about giving clocks...

Some people would say that following these traditions are haraam...
Others would say that its all about the intentions behind everything...

My MiL says its all a paaya wasting scheme...

I just think that celebrating the anniversary of the day you made Nikaah is a wonderful thing. Nikkah is such a huge act of Ibaadah, its the completion of half your deen. In the current time, with divorce so rife, every year together is definitely worth celebrating, besides, day to day, we get so caught up in everyday life that we forget to tell our partners how much we do value them.

 having a day to celebrate each other, is special and perfect for al the right reasons.

I know Imraan's taking me out for lunch. he wanted to know if I don't mind going for lunch instead of supper because we need an early night ahead of our traveling on Sunday.

I am cool with that, I get very tired even though I'm so early in my pregnancy. Growing two babies is hard work.

I decided to do a light breakfast in bed for Imraan...his favourite breakfast menu on a tray in bed, should start the day just right.

For his gift, I really struggled. I wanted something meaningful...something that not only showed my appreciation for our (short) past but also all the hope for our future together.

 It took me awhile, but I think I came up with  gift Imraan would definitely 'get' and appreciate.

I purchased a black horizontal panel frame that could hold 6 pictures.
 I found a picture on my phone of our hands when he put the engagement ring for me, I edited the picture and added the words "our journey began..." at the top.

Next I took a picture from our walima day, it was a close up of a rose Imraan had given me, the picture showed of our wedding rings, I added text below "...as sweet as the fragrance of a rose."

For the third picture i choose an image off the net of a couples hands with two little hands resting in theirs, i faded it into a background image and wrote over it "our journey continues with a sweet promise"

For the next two frames I made two photo size text boxes saying " I look forward to making...", "...many more memories of special moments..."

For the last picture I faded an image of two old wrinkled hands clasped together, I wrote over them "as we grow old together."

After I printed it, I was quiet pleased with the final effect...it was perfect, past, present and future, Insha'Allah.

I also got Imraan a silver branded watch I saw him admire, it was very elegant and masculine at the same time, it had no numbers or date on the face, just the hands...i added a little card to say "for the hours, minutes and seconds we spend that can't be measured...because they simply fill my heart with love."

I am all set for tomorrow...i can't believe its been a year! I made a cute BBM display pic to put up tomorrow as I daydreamed....

I am all set for tomorrow!

unfortunately, looking at the empty suitcases waiting to be packed, I can't say I'm ready for Sunday!

Leme get to it, then...

Part 25: The Calm after the Storm

The days following Dadis departure saw a kind of hush falling over the household. My MiL was filled with a mixture of relief and shame I think. Her subdued personality was a welcome relief for me in a way.

After Saturday mornings damaal, I almost forgot about Imraam's news, but we finally got a chance to talk. He explained that the firm was opening a smaller branch in KZN and he was the top consideration to head the office and team.

His eyes sparkled with excitement as he told me that such an offer was a huge deal at any stage but to be considered this early in your career for such a responsibility was almost unheard off.

All the details were still abit sketchy, but they wanted to let him in on the plans early so he could be part of the planing process.

I am just so so proud of him, I know it would mean longer hours and even more dedication but this is the time for us to work and set up our lives.

I was thrilled for him, Alhumdulliah.

He told me the next few weeks were going to be really hectic and even though his leave had been approved for our trip to Malawi, he was really having second thoughts now.

But, eventually we decided to go. if he took this promotion and with the babies on the way, it might be our last chance for a holiday for a while yet.

I spent most of the week planing and organizing a baby shower for Nasreen. The only upside to my tardiness was that it was truly going to be a surprise shower, she wouldn't see this one coming at all!

Instead of formal invites, I got a digital invite made by Trendy Invites, I found them on facebook and they made the cutest invite to match my candy stripe theme. So I just BMM'd and emailed that out to all our cousins and Nasreen's friends and family. Luckily Sabera was helping me quiet abit and Dilnaas offered to sort out all the food stuff from her side, Dilnaas and Nasreen got along surprisingly well...i never would have thought.

So there's just a few things left to do before we fly out on Sunday. Our flight from King Shaka International was very early in the morning and we had a brief stop over at OR Tambo before boarding a flight to Malawi.

I am really looking forward to this trip, I can't wait to meet Saleema and see some of the places she had on an itinerary for us.

The weekend after we get back, we'll be hosting Nasreen's Baby shower at Dilnaas's Durban holiday flat (lol) , hope Nas stays pregnant till then.

Saturday is a very important day for Imraan and I, its going to be .... exactly one year since we married, Alhumdulliah! I can't wait!

Part 24:leopard print tights and ice blue eyes

I got there just in time, everybody was gathered in the front hallway, my FiL was standing at the doorway, remote in hand to jopen the driveway gate.

My MiL was not happy, she was adding to the noise pollution by saying aloud all the questions everybody else had too, no doubt.

"Zohra, nice to see you but you should have called", my FiL greeted his small sister, sarcastically.

Imraan's Choti Foi, Zohra, was the 'Black Sheep' of the family, I only met her twice in the year that I've been married, once for my wedding and again for a funeral.

She was a petite women with a flamboyant personality and a certain gruffness in her mannerisms that Surtis find to be so unbecoming of a women. Her hair was always kept in a stylish red bob and she always wore full make up. Her eyeballs seemed to large for her small face and slim features. She dressed in her own crazy way.

She had been shelved a spinster for years, living with Dadi until one day she announced that she was getting married. At age 45 she married Mogamet Ally Hernandez, a 55 year old widower she had met on MXIT from Cape Town.

 Nobody was thrilled but nobody tried to stop her. They knew better: Zohra does what Zohra wants.

They all comforted themselves that at least he was a successful plastic surgeon that drove a Ferrari as his everyday car and had a Bentley for weekend use.

Guji can overlook lack of Gujiness so long as status and money reign.

Zohra had caused another stir recently when she and Mogamet had announced that they were adopting two AIDS orphans.

I couldn't wait to see what this was all about, but I had a small clue...

"oh cut the crap, Haroon!", she said as she pushed past my FiL and into the house.

She was wearing leopard print tights and a black ruffled blouse that tied at her neck. What ever height she had lost in the gene pool was made up for with her pencil thin spiky red heels.

She got straight to the point...
"I'm here to fetch my mother!, Ma get your basics, you coming with me!"
Dadi started disagreeing, My MiL started protesting (weakly)...Zohra held up a hand...

"Ma please, your whole life is not here, just your sons are here...im sick of you being passed around one week here, two weeks there, from house to house without a home!

I spoke to Katie last night, she told me how you being treated, enough is enough...i took the first flight i could get, you coming to live with me!

Besides, Cape Town is beautiful."


Then Zohra looked directly at MiL and said, " Anybody who wants to see you, can pack their stale mootias as padkos and come visit you!"
Dadi looked shocked but not unhappy, she seemed relieved...
MiL rushed to help Dadi pack, Zohra told her to leave it...
"Il buy Ma what she needs.
 Ma only take what you want, the rest Kayroon can courier it to Cape Town for you, our flight leaves in 3hours."

Zohra's husband was waiting at the door, his tailored suit looked too fresh for somebody who just hopped of a plane, the ice blue shirt under, matched his eyes perfectly and the dark suit suited his pale complexion perfectly...

He offered Dadi his arm as she stepped out, lifting her one piece luggage.

Dadi turned to wave, "Kuda Hafez..." she almost whispered...

As Zohra was leaving she said to me,"don't forget to invite me for your baby shower!"
And just like that, they were gone...

shew! What a drama, we kinda all just stood dumbfounded for abit not knowing what to say...
my FiL rolled up his sleeves, shrugged and headed back to his room as the fajr azaan began softly in the background...

my MiL sulked away without a word...Shireen already had her phone in her hand and was typing fast, no doubt BBM texting her mother...

Muhammad Bhai quietly closed the front door, Imraan put his hand around me as we walked back to our room..."so when is this baby shower of yours?"...

OMW!!!baby shower! I had completely forgotten to organize one for Nasreen...her due date was looming...

Part 23: Car hooters and gate buzzers

On Friday night I didn't even hear Imraan come in, so when I woke up in the early hours of Saturday, I tried to wake him up to talk.

"its to early baby", he grumbled sleepily.
"imi! I waited all day and night tell me!"
"I'm getting promoted", he muttered into his pillow, he turned and was zonked out again before I could get anymore questions answered.

I smiled to myself...all that stress had been over nothing! At least it was good news, a promotion!Alhumdulliah, that's so awesome, I was so proud of my husband!!

I couldn't fall asleep again, I was too excited. I wanted to talk to Imraan but I knew I wouldn't get a word out of him in this passed out state, Imraan could sleep through anything!

I wondered if he would wake up when the babies cried at night...suppose if they were both crying, he won't have much of a choice, I guess.

I browsed through Facebook, read old feeds, looked at BBM statuses and pro pics, all in the hope of passing the time till fajr so I could chow Imraan's brains.

Finally, it was half an hour before fajr... I heard a loud car hooter, it was very persistent, over and over, it sounded like it was right outside our house!

What on earth was going on?

Last time there was such a racket was when the Memon girl from the corner house got married, but not at this hour!

Suddenly I could hear our intercom buzzer going off, over and over and over again...OMW! This was insane...somebody was trying to wake up the dead!

Imraan sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes, "what's the time? What's happening?"

We could hear the rest of the house come to life as everybody else woke up to the noise, it was scary and bafflingly. Like me, Imraan seemed unsure what to do.

He finally peeped from our room window, "looks like a hired car, GP plates", he said.
He put on his slippers, raked a hand through his hair wearily, "leme go see what's all the fuss".

"I'm coming with you!", I said, throwing on a kaftaan over my nightie.

The car hooter was still blaring, somebody, a women, was now standing by the driveway gate shouting for us to open up...
Imraan looked out again, "its my choti foi...", Imraan said in shock as he shot out of the room...

I looked out the window, the lights in other houses were coming on like fireworks in a night sky, people up and down the street were trying to see what all the ruckus was about.

Lucky me, I had front row seats!

Part 22: Mountains out of Molehills...

On Friday afternoon I had back to back lessons. I kept checking my phone for any calls or messages from Imraan. I was so worried...

finally, just after home time I got a text message from him to say he was still in the meeting and he would see me at home later.

Argh! How vague is that...but at least he sent something. No news is better than NO news...

I stopped at the supermarket on the way home to get some weekend junk food for us, at the magazine rack I couldn't decide between two different pregnancy magazines, I went between them for over 15mins, then I felt for ice cream so I left the magazines and went back to get a tub of my favourite frozen dessert.

Back at the magazine rack, I still couldn't make up my mind..suddenly my phone started ringing, I thought it would be Imraan.

"Hi baby...", I answered.
"Hi baby yourself!", came a giggle, it was Sumaya.
" sorry, sorry, I thought you Imraan.", I apologized wondering why Sumaya was calling me.
"no problem, its nice to be called baby, Muhammad never calls me that anymore", "Anyway, just a heads up, MiL is pacing here, she thinks you forgot about supper.", Sumaya said.
"Omw! Its my turn isn't... I completely forgot Sumaya!", I said in a panic...

What on earth was I going to do...

" I thought so...don't worry, we got your back, I took out chicken for you, you can make that saucy one, sharp sharp.", Sumaya said.
" Shew, thank you...il be home in 5...", I was so grateful.

I rushed home and made my famous 3 sauce chicken, Sumaya had made a salsas and Shireen set the table quickly while I toasted garlic breads. Between the three of us we had supper ready way ahead, much to my MiLs surprise.

I was so lucky to have their help, that's the upside to joint family living, I couldn't thank them enough!

Shireen was teasing me about having a pregnancy brain, a condition of forgetfulness that is very common in pregnancy, when MiL came in...when she saw the chicken dish, she had a fit...

"Fatima! How can you make that! You know Dadi is here, she only eats tarkaree...what is she going to eat now.."

Oh-0

"aye, nevermind nevermind, Il go find something for her", my MiL said.

At supper time, much to my surprise, Dadi was the first person to reach for the saucy chicken saying how,nice and tempting it looked...to which my MiL jumped in...

"Nay nay, Ma you don't eat all that, here I got Moothia for you.."

"Ma hando kaysaki, oh pasta ne hando kaai... dhooro sauce be", Dadi said as she served herself.

Later that night, I unintentionally overheard Dadi on the phone as I passed her room,
" Khatija Bhen, yah maarah waste booh agru che...thoo nee kaabar...Kayroon Gori mara wastai waahi waahi Mootia, freezer ma kaaro...kamkaanari ne kawanu mana kawaach.

Oh-0, dadi is complaining to her daughter that MiL is taking out food fit for the maids...this can't be good...

It wasn't good at all! Her little complain created enough drama over the weekend...

Part 21: closed door meetings and favorite shirts

Today before Jumuah, Imraan called me, frantic...

The secretary had just informed him that the board wants to see him for a closed-door meeting after lunch. Imraan was really worried. Nobody else had been called in for such a meeting since the big guns had arrived so the office was hi-wired with even more speculation...

"make dua for me baby, Il call you soon as I know what's happening...", he said.

" stop stressing, its not going to do you any good, when you go home after Jumuah, go wear your favorite shirt, freshen up etc, then go back...be confident! You awesome, they calling you in to tell you that!", I tried to calm him.

He laughed nervously, "Il phone you later, love you."

"love you too..."

As we rang off, I thought about how hard Imraan had worked to get where he is...

When Imraan completed school, his family naturally expected him to follow Muhammed and Bilal into the business that my FiL worked so hard to build...nobody was happy to hear Imraan had other plans!

Instead of going into business, Imraan wanted to do Law, he didn't know what aspect but he wanted to study, not part time while at the business, but full time. A real college experience. everybody thought he was crazy.

Imraan applied to most of the universities and he got into almost all but his father refused to pay for his studies.

Imraan had very little savings but he was determined, so he looked for bursaries', he finally found one before the final cut-off dates for registration which narrowed his choices down and he settled on UKZN.

 Instead of staying at home, he decided to live on res even though campus was less than 20mins from home. Imraan use to go home every weekend for a night or two.

His father eventually realized that he was serious about this and started putting pressure on Imraan to study business law, Imraan was still determined to carve his own identity and future.

A holiday job as a legal aid is what made him choose conveyance eventually. He loved his current job and had been hoping to move up the ladder.

 It would be his worst nightmare to lose his job, it would be horrible for him.

While we could still live comfortably while he searched for another job in his field, I think the loss of his job would be a very heavy blow. I doubt imraan would be able to go into the family business either way...he just wasn't cut out for it and Bilal would have a field day over his fall.

at Jumuah, I made earnest dua for my dear husband, for us, for our success...in this world and the next...

"oh Allah, if something is good for us, bring it towards us..and if it is bad for us, take it away from us, and bless us with something better, that we may be happy with ..."

Part 20: Leftovers and loving Indian...

Last night we had an Indo-pak supper of butter chicken, lamb karai, beef nihari with rogni naan and aloo parathas.

i love indo-Pak cuisine but Dadi really did go abit overboard with the ordering!
"I thought they kanjoos", she explained.

My MiL was shocked to see the table full of take-away tubs and papper wrappers...she couldn't believe Dadi had ordered food, after years of insisting on 'Ghar nu kawaanu'.

There was so much aloo paratha left over I decided to take a few extra for some of the teachers at school, there was still too much so I wrapped a few in individual foils and decided to give it to some people on the way to work.

in a household as big as ours we have alot of leftovers and sometimes its too much for tumi and thembi even.

Naturally I gave some to the beggars at the robots. I also gave the guy trying to sell me sunglasses, he looked hungry. I was like spreading paratha love...

When I got to the parking lot of the building that houses our school the man that parks next to me drove up right behind me, I had noticed him in my rear-view for quiet awhile, his beat up vw caddy was hard to miss.

usually when he sees me he greets with a polite 'Good morning' as we ride the lift together in silence but today he had a question...

"what was that you gave out at the intersection back there?", he asked.
"erm, some left over food from supper. Potatoe breads...", I kind of explained.
" oh do you mean aa-looo paa-raaathaa? I love those!", he said.
"yes, that, we had so many left over, do you want some?", I offered him.
He took one with a happy smile and as I left the lift he called out, "thanks, I do love myself some Indian!"

Ofcorse, half the staff heard him and looked at me funny, "his talking about food.", I muttered to them as I went into the front doors that was the entrance to our school.


When I told Imraan the story, he roared with laughter and told me not to run away with my green eyed gora.


Recently, I have been paying more attention to Shireens two, I know I'm really in for an adventure. Nobody knows better than me that no two children are alike, not even siblings, I know all about nature vs nurture, but I'm still very nervous!
I can't even tell Shireen's boys apart even after all this time and I find them more than a handful.

I want to raise my children differently but I wonder how that would work . Imraan and I have alot to think about.

Right now, Imraan is still stressing about work, he has been given his biggest case yet, with alot of responsibility, he told me that he feels like his being tested...but why?

I don't know how to calm his nerves. We suppose to be finalizing our Malawi trip for Saleems wedding but Imraan's having second thoughts.

 With this stress at work and my being pregnant, he feels like we should cancel our plans.

Both my mamagee and the Gyni have cleared me for flying, it is early enough in my pregnancy and shukaar I have no complications for them to be concerned.

 *There is malaria tablets that are safe to take while pregnant too so neither doctor saw any reason why I shouldn't go.

But Imraan, being Imraan...can't help but worry!

Now his reasoning that if he has to be unemployed he'd rather be saving that money...
Sigh...i hope we get some clarity on all fronts, soon...

*once again the medical information in this post is not based on any truth or research, the Author just made it up for the sake of the storyline and continuity...always seek the advice of medical professionals.

Re-name, Y'ALL!

so like the introduction and credits explain...this story was never ment to be a story or even a blog...it was a little piece i wrote to amuse my sister.

she blogged it and once I saw it, I just kept going...i didn't think it would gain readership either...but it has.

I'm currently typing part 37 and I feel like this story needs its own identity...its to long to be a spin off or little play up...

I'm thinking of renaming....

1. What do you think?
2. What name do you suggest?

I'd like to keep the description and slogan the same but you welcome to remix that too...

either comment with your suggestions or email them in:)

*maybe* if its super awesome we can make it a competition with a voting and a prize for the name I go with eventually...

Il be thinking too...otherwise, we can just stick with the current name...no sweat!


Ree :)

Part 19: Personnel Files and Secret Recipes

There is something major happening at Imraans office this week, it seems. The big bosses from the main office in Johannesburg have flown in for a meeting.

There is alot of rumors and speculation and I can see that it has Imraan abit worried and stressed out. I know his worried that he could lose his job, but its a worse case scenario.

I found Imraan on the Garden swing after work, his brow in a deep frown.
"what's up, baby?." I asked him, as I sat next to him.
"I think they restructuring at the office...they asked for some personnel files from HR today..." Imraan replied.
"oh...okay...", I wasn't sure what to make of this.
"My file was also requested....", Imraan said, looking at me slowly , the worry was deep and unhidden  in his eyes...
"what if I get laid off..."

" O imi! Don't think like that! There are so many reason why they could be looking at personnel, you just thinking of the worse reason...the office is in a panic because its all hush hush, but you great at what you do love, you saved them a possible law suit for heavens sake! You meticulously, through, intelligent...you closed enough deals for the firm even though you only a junior. They would be crazy to let you go baby, real crazy." I told him honestly.

I'm no lawyer and even though I may be biased, its plainly obvious to anybody that Imraan's great for the firm. I can't imagine any restructuring, if that is what it is, to even affect him.

"I hope you right love...", he said, pulling me towards him. He brushed a kiss on my forehead."otherwise, Il have to admit defeat and join the family business...i have you and our babies to think of now."

I returned his kiss, "it won't come to that, you'll see...have faith."
"Come it's supper time, Dadi said she got supper under control today, she is following a new recipe, all the nawu nawu brides use this recipe and she needs no help..."

"what! You left my old granny to cook for everybody alone!", Imraan looked at me in mock horror.

I laughed, "not exactly, that's just what she wants mummy to think, Sumaya, Shireen and I are in on the secret..."

Imraan looked at me in confusion...

"You see, this special recipe...
Its called...
Call for take-out!"

Imraan burst out laughing! "Dadi ordered 'dukaan' food! Serious!!!!"

"Yups."

"Can't wait to see my mothers face!", he said laughing.

We walked back inside hand in hand, his father and brothers were just coming in from another day at the shop. I couldn't help but wonder if Imraan would be satisfied with that life, if it ever came to that...

Part 18: Bruised egos and high, high heels.

We got back to such a lovely scene on Sunday evening.

 Everybody was crowded around the table having coffee, tea and dippers. The conversation was animated and punctuated with roars of laughter. It looked like the work function had went off perfectly.

 It only took me a moment to realize that MiL wasn't amongst the merry-makers. I wasn't the only one that noticed...

 "where's mummy?", asked Imraan, dragging up chairs for me and him.
 "oh come I tell you'll what happen!", said Dadi
 Oh-0 I thought...what now...

 Sumayas expression was unreadable...no help there.
 "she broke her leg!", said shireen quickly.
 "no she didn't, she fractured her ankle.", said Bilal.
 "I think she sprained it." , said my FiL.

" Wait wait wait! I want to,explain to them.",Dadi began, from the beginning ofcorse, as old people always do...

" Fatima and Imraan, lucky you bought me the healthy shoes...otherwise I too would have been like bechari kayroon Gori.
 Yesterday at the function Kayroon stood one place by the door  saying "welcome, come in come in" to all the noorkers and their families."
"Then when everything started she sat chupchapti down and was listening, anything she wanted to say or do she send message with twins for Sumaya and Shireen. Ma bee, I'm thinking why she don't going here and there, you know she don't sit quietly...but I never ask her anything."

" Then it was time for her award...the man was telling about the award and called Kayroon Gori to come up to the stage."

 "Kayroon Gori woke up slowly, smiling smiling ne hando at everybody."

Dadi explained that as MiL got to the top step, the MC asked everybody to put their hands together for her...Dadi says she don't know what exactly happen but one second MiL was standing, next thing she was a puddle of fabric on the floor...

 OMW!!!! How awful!

 "I think her egos more bruised than her ankle, but we must all be sensitive to her." my FiL said.

 I could only imagine! The overtime award was MiLs proudest moment at the annual function, she looked forward to it the most.
She told me before, that she just loved hearing the story every year.

When Imraan's parents were newly married, my FiL worked very hard to build his business,when it was finally off the ground and established,Imraan's father decided to have a function after Eid to celebrate with his business family.

 One night while planning the function he thought of including awards as he mentioned categories my MiL pip'd in that she needs and award for the time she's alone with the children while my FiL is working....

 That year, at the very first function, my FiL surprised my MiL by calling her on stage to give her a gift for putting up with his long hours and standing besides him through the toughest years, he presented her with a beautiful watch. He then,joked that he hopes she won't expect one every year...

 The following year Imraan was born, that year my FiL got very ill and was unable to be at work for an extend period of time, my FiLs friend stood in for him and really held the business together, he himself was newly married.
once my FiL recovered, he wondered how to thank,his friend for his generous help, it was my MiL again who said that the wife deserve the thanks more. At that years function, my FiL had my MiL present their friends wife with a watch for her patience...and thus, the award was born.

 Every year, a watch is presented to the spouse of the employee who has the most overtime hours, however it has to be a different employee every year, once you have received it, you can't receive it again.
every year, my MiL is called up to present the watch and the story behind it is told.

 After Dadi told us what happen, Imraan and I went to check in on MiL, as I had assumed, she was more beat up over the embarrassment than any physical injury.
as she told her version of the event, I spied the pair of extremely high, high heels near the cupboard, my word! What had she been thinking!

 On the dresser was the watch she had been gifted originally, I admired the classic design.

I know that both Sumaya and Shireen
had been recipients of the award previously. I knew it was unlikely that I ever would be, Imraan was not part of the family business...he actually worked very hard not to be!

 ...but that too, is a story on its own.

Apologies...Re: Add me

I am unable to keep up with the subscription request that have been sent in and I have fallen behind in adding some readers onto the email list.

I apologize, I know I offered but at the time I hadn't anticipated the growth in readership.

If you sent in a " Add me" request recently and you haven't heard back yet, please bare with me, Il get to it.


Thank you for your understanding,
Ree

Road Trip Series-Part 3: Flattery will get you everywhere...

The weekend turned out to be as awesome as I had wanted it to be...and it was all over way to quickly!

On Saturday morning Imraan and I drove along marine drive stopping at some of my favorite beaches, St Micheals, the lagoon in Uvongo and finally ended up in Margate. We parked on the pier and roamed around eating ice cream from a little shop by the rocks, inevitably we found ourselves at the funfair, as we walked between the children's rides we started talking about how nice it would be to bring our own little two here, which led us to talking about names for twins...we decided to make list and then narrow them down, I wanted matching first letters, I think its so cute! 

By lunch time we were back in Sheppy and ordered my favorite pizza for lunch. After lunch Sabera and I went shopping with my mum touring both Shelly Centre and South Coast Mall. I love small towns, everything is so close by. We had so much fun and I really needed time to be with them and just relax.

Imraan went to a fish shop in Marburg to get everything on his mothers list.

When we got home Imraan was sitting in the garden chatting to my twin cousins from upstairs' Omir and Umaar.

What is it with twins, I'm surrounded by them, looks like they were always in my taqdeer.

These two however are like twideldee and twideldum. I never liked them, I don't know how Imraan manages to talk to them, I suppose he was just bored.
Even when we were growing up, they didn't have that mischievous spark like Shireens Yusuf and Yusair.

By supper time I was so tired I fell asleep while chatting to my father in the lounge...imraan must have carried me to the room because when I woke up I was in my bed and it was already Sunday! s

I washed up and went looking for Imraan, I found him in the kitchen teasing my Dadi, while she made him tea and eggs.
"I think Rehana is a very nice name, Dadi...it suits you!", he was telling her.
Dadi was quiet chaffed at all the attention.
"Dadi what is this lutchoo telling you, he just wants breakfast from you coz nobody else is awake yet."
"Dadi laughed, leave him leave him, I miss making breakfast for Dada...he use to have eggs and tarkari every Sundy too!"
Imraan winked at me..
I just shook my head at him, it was awesome how he was so chilled in my family home, I hope Sabera finds somebody like that too.

 Imraan always wants to 'hook her up' with his friends so he'll have company. As I walked away I heard Dadi complaining to Imraan about Dilnaas. 

When did my husband become a panchaat dadoo.

After brunch we left for Durban, it was so sad leaving but both Imraan and I felt so much more lighter and rested after our break. We finally told my family that the doctor said we expecting twins, everybody was super excited.

We had a very hard time packing the car once again, my mother obviously thinks that I don't eat in Durban, she sent things for my MiL, Kala and Mamagee too!

The lady Imraan delivered the pickles too had a 'parcel' that needed to go back to Durban too!
 My aunty from upstairs needed us to buy some stuff from the spice shop in Durban and send it up when somebody was coming...

then came all our goodbyes and warnings to drive safely, call when we reach, come again soon, etc etc...it's funny how the goodbyes can be longer than the visit sometimes, hehe...

I really needed this time with my family though, I miss them...once you get married, it's never the way it use to be.

We slowly backed out of the driveway, as much as its sad to leave, i dont mind so much coz im leaving with my amazing hubby, our marriage and life together is every bit as important as my childhood and the years I spent here...i waved at my family till I couldn't see them in the side mirror anymore and ofcorse I was fast asleep before we even got to the freeway...

Road Trip Series-Part 2: Nails on a Chalkboard

Last nights supper was off the hook...Mummy made all my favorites and most of Imraan's...i definitely ate for three!
 That's still unbelievable, Imraan and I haven't told anybody yet, for some reason. We liked keeping it a secret.

Imraan and I woke up little later than normal for a Friday but we were on holiday right!

besides, my mother said I must sleep as much as I can now, because once baby comes I won't get a chance too...i told her the sleepless nights don't last forever?

She gave me a funny look and said I have a lot to learn...

Dadi explained it little better, she said that even though your baby will eventually sleep all night, your sleep would never be the same, once you become a mother its like the centre of your universe...nothing else matters except your child or children...even if they adults you will still have sleepless nights worrying about them.

I understood the words, but not in the way my mother seemed to understand, it almost tied them together, like an invisible thread, they understood a secret, one I will soon be finding out about.

My sister was all over me with constant teasing and comments, she has always been like this. We are Irish twins, I was born 11 months before her, which would have made her the 'mistake' baby, but my brother Ahmed was born 11 months before me!

guess we were Irish triplets?
 
Growing up, they always told me that I was the mistake, they were perfectly spaced...

Growing up was nice, we were very close and did everything together. Our troubles only started towards the end of high school.

When Ahmed was in Matric he got into a relationship with a girl in Saberas class, she was from a very strict family so she used Sabera and I as excuses to get out of the house...she soon got caught and her relationship with Ahmed was exposed.

Dilnaas is from a wealthy and very strict family. Her parents were understandably furious but the way they made demands without discussion, consensus and understanding caused even more problems.

The minute they found out, they were all over my parents demanding that Ahmed marry Dilnaas immediately!

 It was just before final's and my father thought it would be better to have everything calm down and then all 4 of them could come together and discuss the issue at hand. 

Her father was hearing none if it, he said they were children and need to be told what to do, not asked. To which my father reasoned that, children shouldn't be forced into marriages or be placed in the position of having to get married without proper thought and mashoora. If you not old enough to be asked an opinion on something that would change your life how can you be old enough to get married?

My parents thought that an amicable solution of taking away privileges, imposing a no contact rule and deferring the marriage talk would have been worth it. Ahmed would have been leaving for UCT in January.

My parents tried talking to Ahmed but with all the heat from her parents and Dilnaas's emotional reaction and his looming final's, Ahmed couldn't stop and think straight either. My father pleaded with him to hold off till things were calmer but Ahmed worried what Dilnaas would do if she thought he was abandoning her to face her family alone.

Dilnaas's father felt like my family was condoning Zinna.  

They ended up making Nikkah in her family lounge, mere days before Ahmed's exams, my parents weren't even there. 

Instead of completing school and enjoying the carefree freedom of holiday where it seems like you have the rest of your life in front of you, Ahmed completed school and became son-in-law to a tyrant.

Sabera and I didn't like Dilnaas in school because of all her airs and graces and showing off because of her families wealth...now she was our SiL???!!!!

My parents were so disappointed and hurt, this wasn't the dreams they had for their first born and only son.
Marriage should have come a few years into the future and under better circumstances. It wasn't that they were okay with a relationship before marriage, they just thought the situation could be handled differently.

Ahmed had deferred the Mehar the night of the Nikkah and it was quiet a large sum, in all her ' fragile emotions' Dilnaas was still a princess enough to demand a handsome sum.

Initially Ahmed and Dilnaas lived in their respective homes, with Ahmed visiting her often. He gave up his scholarship to UCT and decided to study BCom.Accounting via Unisa so he could remain in Port Shepstone. He started working for my Uncle too. 

It was a very difficult time, my parents still wished that Dilnaas parents were able to discuss the issue and had not been so hasty. 
Eventually Ahmed started spending more and more time with Dilnaas and her family and once again, without discussion or consensus, he moved in!
He became a 'ghar jamai' and it tore into everything my parents stood for.
 
My father is humble school teacher, now principal, and as much as we not wealthy, we were always comfortable. Our home wasn't big but Ahmed had his own room and had they discusses living together, my parents would have preferred to have Dilnaas move in, instead of Ahmed leave to live with her parents.

It took along time, with many threatened divorces and other drama but things seem to finally be getting better. Sabera and I still feel like we lost the brother we grew up with, Ahmed had been thrown into adulthood, prematurely.

That Friday morning as I drank tea outside talking to Imraan while he fussed about his car stinking of pickle because his foi's neighbour had packed atchaar in the box she sent with us, the latest M3 pulled into the driveway.the sound of the engine had Imraan whistling...i knew immediately  that it was Ahmed and Dilnaas.

I went and stood next to my husband as Dilnaas got out with a screeched, "Faaaaaa-tiiiiiiiii-mmmmmmwah!", I heard you were in town, darling!"

She wore a stunning Hanayan abaya, pencil heels that made her atleast 5cm taller than Ahmed and her scarf perched elegantly over the raised bun on her head. her make up was flawless! Oh, why did my mother invite her...sigh.
She hobbled over to us and Imraan quickly bent down into the booth as if he was busy, I looked down at my slept in pj's and old slippers and felt like a hermit in front of the Muslimah version of a porcelain Barbie doll.

"when Ahmed's mummy phoned and said you'll are here for lunch, I had to make those red and blue valvet cuppies Imraan lurrrrrvvvies- Salaams Imraaaaaan, how are you BiL!!", Imraan muttered something even I didn't understand. 

As Ahmed tried to lead his wife away, her heel snagged on the hem of her flowy abaya, to which Ahmed said, "I told you not to wear those damn shoes or this dress for that matter!", "but its Jumuah! You have to look your best, besides we are guest.",Dilnaas replied.

"right, I'm off baby...see you in a bit.", Imraan said, kissing me.
Which caused my annoying cousins from upstairs to wolf whistle.
In my ear he whispered, I need to get rid of this shit before the whole car smells like methi! And I can't stay here and listen to nails on a chalkboard, sorry...(referring to Dilnaas)...

After he was gone, Ahmed came back out,  leaving for work..."how are you sis, heard you got one in the oven,congrats!", he said giving me a side hug.
I looked up into the face I use to know so well, it was different now, older, tired...it lacked the sparkle and mischief of our childhood. "thanks bro"
"can't wait to have my own too, but I'll spoil yours rotten!", he laughed.

He got into his car and drove off, after finishing his degree he had joined his father-in-laws business. He and Dilnaas had since moved out of the house and now lived in a sea facing apartment in an expensive estate in Uvongo. No doubt a generous gift from daddy dearest.

When I went inside Dilnaas was talking my mothers ear off while mummy and Dadi cooked, "put that radio off, mummy! I hate the sound of some of those adverts!", Sabera stormed in, she has never been a morning person. When she saw Dilnaas she realizes her error and stormed out again- there had been no radio on! 

"Fatima, why don't you and Dilnaas go to the lounge, I'm sure you'll got lots to catch up on.

"Later, I need to bath and read Quraan before Imraan gets back."

I too made a quick exit...

Lunch was soooo yum, mummy made mutton biryani and chicken akni, both of which I love. Why two dishes? Well, the princess doesn't eat lentils ofcorse.
As usual, Imraan covered his entire helping of biryani with a ton of dhai, he can eat anything with dhai!

Usually it causes comments and jokes when others see this but today Dilnaas stole the thunder when she asked for a fork and knife and then proceeded to eat her akni using them...however, nobody said anything, even Sabera was speechless!...for now...

it occurred to me that once Dilnaas and Ahmed left my mum and dadi would complain about Dilnaas and Sabera and I would add our two sense...aa much as I hate to admit it, we as bad as any in-laws...

its a vicious cycle that we suffer from, as a community...daughters are diamonds and daughter-in-laws are diamanties.

was the onesided way we treated Dilnaas any different to the way my MiL treated me?

I decided to be the change I wanted to see...to treat her the same way i expected Imraan's family to treat me...

oh! When did I get so mature, thoughtful and serious... i have a fabulous weekend ahead of me...

Road Trip Series-Part 1: Destination HOME

Today Imraan and i got off work early so we could load up and leave for Port Shepstone.

We were only going till Sunday so we shared a small suitcase,but you would never say! Our booth and backseat were full, granted we have a small polo Gti, but still. 

My MiL packed a million little this and that's for us for the 'road'...its only an hours drive, mind you. 

She also sent 'durban' things for my mother, coz you know how asmall place like NPS doesn't have shops. Although she did give Imraan a rather long sea food shopping list.

My Kala, Nasreens mum, had a 'parcel' to send for my mum.

Then, at the last minute, Imraan's Gori foi, Khatijah, phoned to ask if we can take one small parcel for her neighbors niece in Albersville, this lady also wanted to know if we will be stopping in Umzinto (coz you know its 'on the way') because she had a urgent wedding invite card she needed to send to her sister.

despite telling her we won't be going to umzinto, her son who came to drop of the 'parcel'- a big heavy box-handed us the invite, 'just in case you'll stop'...
(erm, stop? Why, do they live on the side of the freeway)

after we crammed everything into the car, we were finally ready to hit the road.

I last remembered passing Isipingo , my head heavy against the headrest. when I opened my eyes again we where just taking the Hibberdene turn-off. 

"Hi sleepy-head...can you hear anything?" Imraan asked me with amusement.
I listened for a moment, puzzled..."nope", I replied confused.
"Ah, good then, that snoring sound is gone!" he said, laughing at his own lame joke.
I swatted at his arm playfully and he jerked the steering wheel to right and back giving me a huge fright!
"don't do that!" I exclaimed loudly, placing a hand on my abdomen.
"I didn't, you the one that hit me!" he said
"oh please, just drive"..." yes boss" he winked back...i stuck out my tongue at him and turned to watch the ocean as afternoon turned to evening...

I really love my husband, we have so much to look forward too.

Before I knew it we were pulling into the driveway of my parents home in Shelly Beach. The ground floor of the house is where I grew up and got married from. Upstairs, my fathers brother lives, they have a view of the distant ocean from their lounge and balcony.

The minute I walked through the front door, I was a child again... I flopped onto the sofa while my mother and Dadi fussed over me.
" put your feet up""why you carrying things"" you want some tea"
ahh...the smell of my mummy's cooking, the ding ding of the old grandfather clock in the passage, the feel of our leather couches, the smell of Dadis favourite furniture polish...i was home!...only one part missing..


"oh, stop fussing over her!...she's pregnant not an invalid..."
"Shew, looks like you moving in with all the stuff you brought for the weekend!" my sister said sarcastically as she came into the lounge. I smiled brightly at her, "Nice to see you too, Sabera." I said happily....right, now i was truly home!

Imraan who was just bringing in the last of our stuff, had heard her..."don't give her all those gifts you bought her, Tima...this big mouth doesn't deserve them" 
I saw Sabera getting ready with a cheeky remark of her own, I quickly tuned them out...they would carry on for hours!

I headed to the kitchen to find my father...it was good to be home!

Announcement 4: Road Trips Mini series...

Fatima has been wanting to visit her family for a while now...so here comes a Roaaaad Triiiipppp...
She is amped to be going home and we amped to be meeting her side of the family.

This 3 Part Mini Series shows us around Port Shepstone and some of her old haunts and introduces new characters, obviously that means more panchaat, drama and majaah for us!

**Spoiler Alert:
Also, in this Mini Series...find out which character i used my name for...i just couldn't resist! ;)

It's time for a Road Trip...Buckle up!

Hitting the accelerator and heading down the coast...
Ree!

Part 17: A little blimp...or two!

Imraan and I were so excited over our first visit to the Gyni, I was lucky to get an appointment so soon too, the waiting list is really long.

When we got there I was shocked at how full the waiting room was with pregnant women...
I filled out my details, was told not to pee till after I saw Dr. and made to weigh myself.

The man sitting next to the scale actually looked at the weight reading while I was taking it! How rude! I gave him a dirty look.
 
I flipped through old pregnancy magazines while Imraan fiddled with his phone, I knew he was nervous, so was I...i don't know why.

Finally it was our turn, the Dr was nice looking in a fatherly way and I immediately felt comfortable as he made salaam and shook Imraan's hand asking him if they had met before etc. Imraan admitted that he had went to school with Drs son. We discussed my general health and medical history, symptoms and fears.
*I explained that I had fell pregnant while on birthcontrol, and think I might have missed one without realizing, however I stopped taking them them the day we found out I was pregnant. Dr assured me I have nothing to worry about regarding the pill affecting the fetal development.* I also mentioned I had started folic acid already on advice from my GP, when he saw my Mamagees name on the card he said they had been in Med school together. I admitted that my GP was also my mothers brother. The Dr laughed and said this seems to be a 'contection call' to which Imraan replied, "yah, 45th cutting connections". The Drs mannerisms, warmth and humour made me feel sure of my decision to see him.

He did the Ultrasound and said, "Masha'Allah your baby looks very healthy and is growing well, there is good blood flow to the placenta, the dates must be off but because the measurements are showing less than the predicted gestation. Lets check the heartbeat first then Il redo your expected due date, due dates are not important, Allah decides when and where we are born, but its nice to have an idea to track progress."

Dr flipped a switch, moved the scanner around pressing it harder against my abdomen until a 'dum dum dum' sound filled the room..."that's your baby's heart" he said. 
What a beautiful moment, I looked into Imraan's eyes and saw the amazement and love there.
Dr was still,fiddling around, his brow frowning, the heartbeat sound was coming and going, he was moving the scanner to two locations...
His concentration scares me...something was wrong!

"there is two heartbeats, Alhumdulliah...", he began.
"two heart beats! I panicked, not giving him a chance to finish, is something wrong with my baby!" tears filled my eyes.

Imraan placed a hand on my knee, let him finish Tima...(he had heard this story once before)

Dr cleared his throat, "Fatima, it means you carrying twins, Masha'Allah, that is why the dates and measurements don't match, I'm going to try a more dynamic view to see if I can find the other baby, this one is blocking it but they move around alot, even though you can't feel it yet..." he said gently.

Twins...TWINS...twins!!! OMW...i thought of the two at home...what was I in for!...

**The Author fabricated much of the medical information provided in this post for purposes of the story and continuity, please don't consider any of it to be true. Always contact a medical practioner for advice.

Part 16:From Best to worst...

I was still feeling terrible about the way MiL made Dadi feel regarding her outfit for the function so I asked Imraan if we could take Dadi shopping to get her some stuff she may need, he loved the idea and said we should do that this afternoon.

Because Imraan worked through his two hour lunch break throughout Ramadaan, he had plenty of leave hours stocked up now for him to do extend his lunch break when he needed too.
Like tomorrow, we have an appointment with the Gyni and it is at 1pm, Imraan is on lunch so we will go together and he already requested an extension so we have no rush.

I told Dadi we want to take her to buy some things she may need for the function 'incase' any nice Nana's are there.
She was so excited! "You'll want to take me mall? Real mall? Not china mall?"
I laughed!" G Dadi, we'll go to Gateway Oki?, there's enough shops and variety..."
"areh baapre baap, haatchi waat? nobody takes a dhoohi like me to Gateway, rooj mana maan tai, o jawa, lookor handa mani ke ooh booh doohi Cho, o taakhi jaahe. Rooj mana Game City jaayche. kayne kayne...whoo karai."1

Ag man...why do we treat the old in our families like lepers'...

MiL was very, very busy today, I got the impression that we were expecting guest but she didn't mention who, when I told her Imraan and I would be taking Dadi to do some shopping because I had a short day at school, she actually seemed relieved, she didn't even try to hide it. She looked at me with such glee, as if I was the best DiL in the world!

We took Dadi to every 'healthy shoes' shop till she found a pair that she liked and was comfortable in. After we were done, we made our way to a stationery shop so I could browse and stock up on some school supply's...you can never have enough, right!
I found an amazing pregnancy calendar to record all the little milestones, it came with cute stickers for 'first ultrasound','heard your heartbeat', 'im getting huge', 'felt you move'...etc.
I just had to buy it! 
Dadi meantime, showed up with two teddy bears, one pink and one blue...i laughed at her and told her she'll have to wait till baby comes before she knows which to get...she said, "I already know...BOTH!"...

I just smiled at her and put them back. She showed me an embroidery kit she found to make one piece every month that would eventually turn into a quilt..."Booh sastoo sastoo, only R14,95..." I tried to explain that it was a monthly thing, the first set would be cheap and then each month it got more and more expensive, but I decided not too, she seemed so excited and a hobby would be good for her, I checked the subscription details at the back and took it to Imraan, he agreed we should pay the lump sum subscription and have each installment delivered to us monthly, so we could give it to her.

Once I was done with my purchase we visited too many electronic and clothes stores, without even realizing it, time had flown and it was too late for Imraan to drop us home and make it back to the office and then back to Umhlanga for a meeting with a client. We pondered what to do, and then decided that Dadi and I would wait for him to be done with his work and go home later, Dadi was adamant that she wasn't tied and as long as she could read Asr and Magrib it was no problem, I took her to the Jamaat Khanaa while Imraan made the necessary calls to his office to inform them of his change in plans. 
After Asr, Dadi and I remained in the JK while Imraan went to his meeting, he said he'd meet us back for supper at a seafood restaurant because Dadi loved 'feeesh'.

I put my phone on silent and Dadi read yaseen and 'all her dua's' while I read Surah Yusuf and Surah Mariam. 

After Magrib Dadi and I met Imraan again and we enjoyed a lovely meal. Dadi was starting to look tired but she also looked happy and relaxed, it was obvious she was enjoying herself and once again I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. 
She scoffed at my prawns saying she can't believe I eat them and I insisted she try...but she refused, I was trilled that I was tolerating seafood.

Straight after supper we went home, little tired and weary but no worse for wear.
However, what awaited us...wasn't a sight for sore eyes!

My MiL was furious! "Where were you'll! I tried your phones so many times, just ringing and ringing!" Oh-0, I had forgotten mine on silent and Imraan's had been off because of his meeting.
However, I couldn't understand why MiL was so angry...worried I get, but angry?

"Shaabir Papa came all the way for supper, how it looked that you'll weren't here!"...MiL fumed. "I went out of my way to invite them coz they couldn't make it for Eid, I prepared whole day, and you'll let me down like this." she was almost in tears...
I still couldn't understand why it was such a huge deal...
"they wanted to take Dadi home with them too, but she wasn't here and we couldn't get hold of you'll...imagine how they feel, all the way from stanger for nothing!" MiL went on...
"Ma you never even told us we having visitors.", Imraan said.
" Your Fatima told me you'll going to buy few things in your lunch break...how must I know your lunch break starts at Zohar and finishes' Esha wakaat", MiL was not taking any excuses today...
And then the main reason dropped...
" Now Dadi is stuck here for who knows how long!..all because of you two!", MiL exploded...
"All my hard work for nothing..."

Ah, and just like that, I became the worst DiL ever for trying to do something nice...but MiL didn't see the kind of example she was setting for Sumaya, Shireen and I.


Glossary:

1. oh my word, for true? nobody takes an old lady like me, i usually feel like going but everybody says im so old i will end up getting tired. i only go to Game City, nevermind but, what can i do.

Part 15: Who's the real Ho Maa here...All that glitters is not gold!

Things have been a little tense around here because MiL expected Dadi to leave on Eid day, but Dadi didn't! Instead she extended her stay indefinitely by saying that since Shaabir (her eldest son) hadn't come on Eid day, she had nobody to go with and she doesn't want to trouble anybody to drive her "here and there", so she will just stay here till a more convenient opportunity to leave comes up.

Ofcorse, my FiL told her there was no rush and she is most welcome to stay for as long as she likes, hadn't he offered her years ago to claim the second guest bedroom as hers and move in permanently. Dadi really glowed after that.

Quiet frankly I don't think anybody besides MiL and Shireen were bothered by Dadis presence. She fits into the household seamlessly. I for one enjoy having her around, she is very witty and her cooking and baking has fulfilled all my cravings!

I know Sumaya likes her too because she has enough patience with Talha.
So the only people that mind having Dadi are MiL and Shireen. Shireens reason was obvious, Dadi didn't like Shireen at all and made no secret of that. Dadi also disapproved of MiLs fondness over Shireen which was clearly different from her quick annoyance and hasty judgments of both Sumaya and I.

MiLs reasons for wanting Dadi to leave is less obvious and more typical. Dadi was fond of ruffling MiLs feathers and complained loudly and often. "Kayroon Gori, you got two-two maids and you still can't keep the house clean!, look at all the dust!"

So, while my FiL went out of his way to make Dadi feel welcome in the home, MiL tripped all over herself with subtle hints hidden behind false kindness.
"oh, Ma...its no trouble for us to drop you off, you know that...the boys won't mind at all! Even Fatima drives, she can drop you off too..."

Imraan's water glass came down fast, landing with a thud against the table, " Fatima is NOT  driving around unnecessarily, and dropping Dadi off is completely unnecessary. Dadi is in no hurry to go anywhere and besides, we won't be here this weekend, so Dadi can help you with Abbas work function.", Imraan said, sterner than was necessary.

Every year after Eid, my FiL holds a huge function for all the workers at the store. Every employee and their immediate family was invited, from the senior management (Muhammad and Bilal) right down to the cashiers and cleaners. It was the most looked forward to day in the company calendar and it was consider a perk of the job. I hadn't attended the previous ones and I was going to miss this years one too. 

A huge tent was erected in the back yard to hold over 400 people. The function was fully catered and help was outsourced for every aspect, however, if you overheard my MiL speak of the function, you would never know...she acted as if she was single handedly, physically doing every job instead of merely co-coordinating and overseeing as others performed the task.

"This year I'm making almost 60 roast chickens and oven vegetables.", she told one of her sisters over the phone. (really, are you cooking them in your extra width defy oven then?)
"every year we make same same things nahando, but this year, I changed it completely!", she told her SiL (it was the catering company that insisted that the menu needs a change, it had been the same for almost 25 years!)
"we serving mutton karai , hatchi waat! One whole sheep we'll cut!, I'm telling you, I'm so busy with all this.", she told her cousin from danahausser. (not to busy to phone you and tell you how busy I am, though)
"I have to serve vegetable biryani, madragee lorko kayne kaisaaki.", she told Shireens mother when she came over to visit (imagine, if vegetarians ONLY ate veg biryani!)

The function was such a big deal to my MiL as bosses wife that every year she had an outfit made, like it was the Oscars. This years teal and sea green printed fabric dress had a glittery netting and long flowing selves...so unsuitable for a 'busy' hostess. The dress leaked glitter all over the tiles every time MiL moved. When she tried it on for us, Talha loudly whispered to me that, "Dadi looks like the witch from that story you taught me in school, Fatima ma'am."
MiL acted like she didn't hear him and proceeded to show me all the bling she'll wear to match the dress...it was all abit much and over the top...but I didn't say so...

Tumi who was walking past with a jug of water, got so distracted by the dress she nearly trip and spill it...the string of insults hurled out of my MiLs mouth sent poor Tumi scurrying to the kitchen. 
Ah, all that glitters is not gold!

"How can Dadi come! She doesn't have anything nice to wear!", my MiL snapped at Imraan's suggestion.
"I brought a nice dress, my friend Shahedaah the dressmaker sewed for me from that chalaaktu challaktu fabric Fatima gave wedding time.", Dadi said hopefully.

For some reason, I suddenly felt very sorry for Dadi.
"you can't wear that old thing!", my MiL said adamantly, insulting both Dadi and I in one careless statement.
Dadi suddenly looked very small and sad, I wanted to go over and hug her.

"That's enough Kayroonisa!", my FiL sounded very angry (rare for him), "the staff don't need you to show them how fancy you are!, Ma can wear whatever she likes."

That out to put an end to the nasty
...oh so I thought...

Part 14: Back to the present

I've spent so much time recently, thinking of the past and how Imraan and I met and our wedding. I'm really looking forward to our first wedding anniversary. I really need to find Imraan a awesome, memorable gift. We also had our up coming trip to Malawi for Saleems wedding, to finalize.

I am really looking forward to that too. Malawi is not a place i ever intended to visit, if it wasn't for Saleems wedding I doubt Imraan and I would have even considered it. But Saleem is Imraan's best friend and its so close to our anniversary, we would have went away somewhere anyway.

I have been chatting to Saleema, Saleems fiancee for awhile now. (yes, Saleem and Saleema...too cute hey!) I was so surprised that there are Indians in Malawi, for some reason I never thought of that, so when Imraan told me that Saleems getting engaged to a girl from Malawi,I had thought...well, I'm too embarrassed to admit, even in my diary, what the snob in me, had thought.

Turns out Saleema is more Indian than Il ever be! She and her brothers were actually born in India but her family moved to Malawi when she was only a few months old.

From chatting to her I learned that Malawi has a relatively large community of Indian Muslims, restaurants and even hotels. She already had an itinerary planned for our visit, I couldn't wait to go and to meet her.

I was really looking forward to having some company too, usually when Imraan's friends go out, for fishing weekends or evening sports...I stay at home. I spend the time watching TV, catching up with series or playing with Talha or Tariq so Sumaya can have a break.

Very rarely do I make plans with my own friends or Nasreen that co-ordinate with Imraan's plans. Sometimes I visited my Kala or Mamagee during that time.

While I had met most of the other wives on different occasions, I only spent time with them when we attended weddings of  one of the other guys in the group.
Mainly because whenever the husbands made spur of the minute plans, the wives used it as extra time to visit their own families', which I would have done too, but my parents don't live 'around the corner' or 'down the road'. 

Saleema would be in the same boat as me and now I'd have the company to join in on some of the spur of the moment events, and go watch some of their games.

When Imraan and his friends plan longer outings for fishing over the holiday season, I always go home for that time...i don't know what Saleema will do or if Saleem would still go, leaving her alone.

I can't imagine what it must be like to marry and move to a whole new country. Saleemas brother married a South African girl from Johannesburg, who is Saleems first cousin, Saleema told me that Haseena is having a very hard time adapting to the different lifestyle. Malawi is a far cry from the fast-past life she was use to in Johannesburg. She also misses her family alot and feels isolated due to language differences, she is trying to adapt. Saleema worries that Haseena would feel more alone after Saleema herself marries.

I went back to work after Eid and I'm so glad I have a job that allows me flexibility...even though the children thrive on routine, at this point of the year they settle down well enough to interchange activities. 
I work mostly with those with birth defects and speech and hearing difficulties so changes to schedules doesn't cause any major setbacks.

However, those teachers who work with the Autistic children have much more rigid timetables as its part of their development needs. It takes alot of experience and patience to work within this sphere and I hope to enter that area once I complete my Honours program.

Imraan's Dadi has extend her visit with us and my MiL seems to be at her wits-end now. I get the feeling she is just waiting for a chance to politely tell her MiL it is time to go...

I wonder what this weekend has in store...

Announcement 3: Chapter 2

Flash back is over and its time to get back to the present. 
Tommorrow, Chapter 2 of 'The Real Diary of a Guji Wife' begins with Part 14.

Join Fatima for all her panchaat and excitement over her first wedding anniversary, Saleem's wedding, their plans to go to Malawi, her road trip to her home town, her Gyni appointment and why Dadi hasn't left after Eid...

All this and more, coming up in Chapter 2.

With her knack for drama, MiLs interference and all the mischief makers, things are bound to get out of hand and go off track...

Chapter 2...Starts tomorrow.
Love&Duas and a sprinkling of the good stuff...
Ree!