Road Trip Series-Part 2: Nails on a Chalkboard

Last nights supper was off the hook...Mummy made all my favorites and most of Imraan's...i definitely ate for three!
 That's still unbelievable, Imraan and I haven't told anybody yet, for some reason. We liked keeping it a secret.

Imraan and I woke up little later than normal for a Friday but we were on holiday right!

besides, my mother said I must sleep as much as I can now, because once baby comes I won't get a chance too...i told her the sleepless nights don't last forever?

She gave me a funny look and said I have a lot to learn...

Dadi explained it little better, she said that even though your baby will eventually sleep all night, your sleep would never be the same, once you become a mother its like the centre of your universe...nothing else matters except your child or children...even if they adults you will still have sleepless nights worrying about them.

I understood the words, but not in the way my mother seemed to understand, it almost tied them together, like an invisible thread, they understood a secret, one I will soon be finding out about.

My sister was all over me with constant teasing and comments, she has always been like this. We are Irish twins, I was born 11 months before her, which would have made her the 'mistake' baby, but my brother Ahmed was born 11 months before me!

guess we were Irish triplets?
 
Growing up, they always told me that I was the mistake, they were perfectly spaced...

Growing up was nice, we were very close and did everything together. Our troubles only started towards the end of high school.

When Ahmed was in Matric he got into a relationship with a girl in Saberas class, she was from a very strict family so she used Sabera and I as excuses to get out of the house...she soon got caught and her relationship with Ahmed was exposed.

Dilnaas is from a wealthy and very strict family. Her parents were understandably furious but the way they made demands without discussion, consensus and understanding caused even more problems.

The minute they found out, they were all over my parents demanding that Ahmed marry Dilnaas immediately!

 It was just before final's and my father thought it would be better to have everything calm down and then all 4 of them could come together and discuss the issue at hand. 

Her father was hearing none if it, he said they were children and need to be told what to do, not asked. To which my father reasoned that, children shouldn't be forced into marriages or be placed in the position of having to get married without proper thought and mashoora. If you not old enough to be asked an opinion on something that would change your life how can you be old enough to get married?

My parents thought that an amicable solution of taking away privileges, imposing a no contact rule and deferring the marriage talk would have been worth it. Ahmed would have been leaving for UCT in January.

My parents tried talking to Ahmed but with all the heat from her parents and Dilnaas's emotional reaction and his looming final's, Ahmed couldn't stop and think straight either. My father pleaded with him to hold off till things were calmer but Ahmed worried what Dilnaas would do if she thought he was abandoning her to face her family alone.

Dilnaas's father felt like my family was condoning Zinna.  

They ended up making Nikkah in her family lounge, mere days before Ahmed's exams, my parents weren't even there. 

Instead of completing school and enjoying the carefree freedom of holiday where it seems like you have the rest of your life in front of you, Ahmed completed school and became son-in-law to a tyrant.

Sabera and I didn't like Dilnaas in school because of all her airs and graces and showing off because of her families wealth...now she was our SiL???!!!!

My parents were so disappointed and hurt, this wasn't the dreams they had for their first born and only son.
Marriage should have come a few years into the future and under better circumstances. It wasn't that they were okay with a relationship before marriage, they just thought the situation could be handled differently.

Ahmed had deferred the Mehar the night of the Nikkah and it was quiet a large sum, in all her ' fragile emotions' Dilnaas was still a princess enough to demand a handsome sum.

Initially Ahmed and Dilnaas lived in their respective homes, with Ahmed visiting her often. He gave up his scholarship to UCT and decided to study BCom.Accounting via Unisa so he could remain in Port Shepstone. He started working for my Uncle too. 

It was a very difficult time, my parents still wished that Dilnaas parents were able to discuss the issue and had not been so hasty. 
Eventually Ahmed started spending more and more time with Dilnaas and her family and once again, without discussion or consensus, he moved in!
He became a 'ghar jamai' and it tore into everything my parents stood for.
 
My father is humble school teacher, now principal, and as much as we not wealthy, we were always comfortable. Our home wasn't big but Ahmed had his own room and had they discusses living together, my parents would have preferred to have Dilnaas move in, instead of Ahmed leave to live with her parents.

It took along time, with many threatened divorces and other drama but things seem to finally be getting better. Sabera and I still feel like we lost the brother we grew up with, Ahmed had been thrown into adulthood, prematurely.

That Friday morning as I drank tea outside talking to Imraan while he fussed about his car stinking of pickle because his foi's neighbour had packed atchaar in the box she sent with us, the latest M3 pulled into the driveway.the sound of the engine had Imraan whistling...i knew immediately  that it was Ahmed and Dilnaas.

I went and stood next to my husband as Dilnaas got out with a screeched, "Faaaaaa-tiiiiiiiii-mmmmmmwah!", I heard you were in town, darling!"

She wore a stunning Hanayan abaya, pencil heels that made her atleast 5cm taller than Ahmed and her scarf perched elegantly over the raised bun on her head. her make up was flawless! Oh, why did my mother invite her...sigh.
She hobbled over to us and Imraan quickly bent down into the booth as if he was busy, I looked down at my slept in pj's and old slippers and felt like a hermit in front of the Muslimah version of a porcelain Barbie doll.

"when Ahmed's mummy phoned and said you'll are here for lunch, I had to make those red and blue valvet cuppies Imraan lurrrrrvvvies- Salaams Imraaaaaan, how are you BiL!!", Imraan muttered something even I didn't understand. 

As Ahmed tried to lead his wife away, her heel snagged on the hem of her flowy abaya, to which Ahmed said, "I told you not to wear those damn shoes or this dress for that matter!", "but its Jumuah! You have to look your best, besides we are guest.",Dilnaas replied.

"right, I'm off baby...see you in a bit.", Imraan said, kissing me.
Which caused my annoying cousins from upstairs to wolf whistle.
In my ear he whispered, I need to get rid of this shit before the whole car smells like methi! And I can't stay here and listen to nails on a chalkboard, sorry...(referring to Dilnaas)...

After he was gone, Ahmed came back out,  leaving for work..."how are you sis, heard you got one in the oven,congrats!", he said giving me a side hug.
I looked up into the face I use to know so well, it was different now, older, tired...it lacked the sparkle and mischief of our childhood. "thanks bro"
"can't wait to have my own too, but I'll spoil yours rotten!", he laughed.

He got into his car and drove off, after finishing his degree he had joined his father-in-laws business. He and Dilnaas had since moved out of the house and now lived in a sea facing apartment in an expensive estate in Uvongo. No doubt a generous gift from daddy dearest.

When I went inside Dilnaas was talking my mothers ear off while mummy and Dadi cooked, "put that radio off, mummy! I hate the sound of some of those adverts!", Sabera stormed in, she has never been a morning person. When she saw Dilnaas she realizes her error and stormed out again- there had been no radio on! 

"Fatima, why don't you and Dilnaas go to the lounge, I'm sure you'll got lots to catch up on.

"Later, I need to bath and read Quraan before Imraan gets back."

I too made a quick exit...

Lunch was soooo yum, mummy made mutton biryani and chicken akni, both of which I love. Why two dishes? Well, the princess doesn't eat lentils ofcorse.
As usual, Imraan covered his entire helping of biryani with a ton of dhai, he can eat anything with dhai!

Usually it causes comments and jokes when others see this but today Dilnaas stole the thunder when she asked for a fork and knife and then proceeded to eat her akni using them...however, nobody said anything, even Sabera was speechless!...for now...

it occurred to me that once Dilnaas and Ahmed left my mum and dadi would complain about Dilnaas and Sabera and I would add our two sense...aa much as I hate to admit it, we as bad as any in-laws...

its a vicious cycle that we suffer from, as a community...daughters are diamonds and daughter-in-laws are diamanties.

was the onesided way we treated Dilnaas any different to the way my MiL treated me?

I decided to be the change I wanted to see...to treat her the same way i expected Imraan's family to treat me...

oh! When did I get so mature, thoughtful and serious... i have a fabulous weekend ahead of me...